Weekly Rankings

*Henceforth Kenjon Barner will be referred to as Huey, Mariota is Louie, D’Anthony Thomas is Dewey, and Chip Kelly is Scrooge McDuck. If you don’t get this reference then odds are, I don’t care for you as a person*

Brownie's Rankings 

1. Bama

2. K-State – It has been a magical run for the Great White Hope and co., but the story ends in Ft. Worth this week. And I know I’m a bit of a homer but I don’t even see it being that close. Klein will be playing through pain and TCU is coming off one of the biggest wins in program history. Amon G. Carter is going to be absolutely out of control, even if the Hyper Frogs are crying about the drunk assholes the entire time. Sorry Wildcats, I wish y’all could go all the way, I really do, but your title hopes end Saturday.

3. Oregon – Kenjon Barner is within striking distance of (Louis)CK for the Heisman and he has the Flying V in a great position to play for their second National Title in 3 years.

4. Notre Dame – They are losing this week. I just feel it.

5. UGA – If they keep up what they are doing offensively, they may actually give Bama a run for their money in the title game. You know, before they end up losing by 25.

6. Ohio State – This one is for you Steen ;)

7. Florida – They can’t score. They just simply can’t.

8. South Carolina – Cocks on cocks on cocks

9. Louisville – I just can’t bring myself to rank three SEC teams in a row.

10. LSU – Props to them for giving Bama a hell of a fight. To their credit the game was way more entertaining than last year. Of course, passing a kidney stone would be more entertaining than last year.

Where's tha Gold at? Give me tha Gold

Heisman

(Louis)CK – he hangs on, but just barely. Barner is breathing down his neck.

By the way, if you didn’t see the real Louis CK host SNL then you just simply have to watch this video. This may be one of the best SNL skits I’ve seen since Will Ferrell left. http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/lincoln/1422756/

Huey – I mean, you all know what he did to USC.

            

            Manti Te’o –  this is really just for the sake of having three people. It’s a two man race.

Marsh's Rankings 

j        1. Alabama-The Tigers own dream died in Baton Rouge Saturday. 

         

         2. Kansas State-With CK playing well, they can beat anyone. 

       

         3. Oregon-More complete than KSU and for so many reason, I want to put them at number 2 next week. 

    

         4. Notre Dame-Haven't seen Irish get this lucky since E married Sloan on Entourage. 

         5. The Ohio State University-Romney wishes their electoral votes didn't count either...

         6. Louisville-They're undefeated late in the season. As a TCU fan, I hated when people wrote us off at 9-0. 

           

         7. UGA-Alabama vs Georgia could be an interesting title game. Until Shawshank comes on TNT. 

         8.  South Carolina-Cocks vs Beavers bowl game please. Strong defense by Oregon State at first, but Carolina penetrates and gets the job done early. ;)

         9. Florida-With Jager Bombs and camo-cargo shorts, the Guidos of the SEC live to fight another day. 

         10. LSU-Even though The Honey Badger will likely transfer to Colorado next year and they lost to Bama at least they don't have this guy as a fan...

No! I don't want a hand jibber! I wanted a win! :( : (

                                                                             Heisman 

          1. Collin Klein-What comes first, his first Heisman or his first blow jibber. Either way it's gonna come quick. 

         2. Teo-I haven't like a Hawaiian this much since Surf Ninjas. 

         3. Hot, cursing UT girl-Don't call it a comeback.